With that big day coming fast, I thought I would share this recipe with you.
Christmas Fruit Cake
1 cup water
1 cup sugar
4 large eggs
2 cups dried fruit
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 Gallon whiskey
1. Sample the whiskey to check for quality. Take a large bowl.
2. Check the whisky again to be sure it is of the highest quality. Pour one level cup and drink. Repeat.
3. Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1 cup butter in a large, fluffy bowl.
4. Add 1 teaspoon sugar and beat again.
5. Turn off mixer.
6. Make sure the whiskey is still okay. Cry another tup.
7. Break 2 eggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the turner.
8. If the fried druit gets stuck in the eaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.
9. Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity.
10. Next, sift 2 cups of salt. Or something.
11. Who cares? Check the whiskey.
12. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
13. Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever you can find.
14. Grease the oven.
15. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.
16. Don't forget to beat off the turner.
17. Throw the bowl out the window.
18. Check the whiskey again.
19. Go to bed. Who the heck likes fruitcake anyway?
I'm sure many of you have seen this already, but it's still a good one. My niece sent me this recipe a few years ago and I've noticed it's circulating again. If you've never seen it, try it. It's sure to be a success. *grin*